He sat on the end of the bed

And on the window unit

Peering in

Left footprints

A crumpled bed

He walked on in

And went to work

Knew a thing or two

It was overwhelming

To be present

But not present

To be there

But elsewhere

It felt like it was far off

Me

But not me

Him

But not him

Fear

But not fear

A disunity

A wall

A separation

How can you feel fear

Even with footprints

Even with whispers

When fear is beside you

Near

But not near

No wonder we disassociate

When I summer

It’s all a dream

That I play with

Or not

But you cant hurt me

While you hurt me

I’ve got to work through this anger

That’s why I’m writing, huh?

It’s why you run.

It’s why she sings.

It’s my thing to spit ink.

It’s my thing to paint mean things

I honest on paper

I not afraid to be seen

I invisible back

I chomp and bite

Like a skyscraper at night

Cutting a line always

That is there when not

You’re not bigger than me

You’re a second to my minute

You’re a knock knock to my full-length play

You’re a chord to my LP

You’re an exhale to my long long life

And I’m aware that it sounds like I hate you

But I don’t think of you enough to hate you.

I just hate that you only saw me and still see me as

Utility

I can see now

That was one awful sermon.

So thank you for stickin’ ‘round.

I didn’t see how thick the grime was

All up my arms and down my pride

What a little boy was I

With no time to say no

Cause Sunday at 6 comes

Ready or not

And that lady on the plane

Gave me something to say

That seemed to fit the bill

But I was so glad

Just to get

That momentous event

Done with.

One side of the stadium hated me

One side loved me

I was undecided

Could see good points from both sides

But really just wanted to escape

Into Cape Cod in Georgia

By the pool

Or, truth be told,

back under the covers

For six days

Before I’d have to do it

All again

I’ve never wanted

To lift out

So badly

In all my life

They will be tested tomorrow

The final few

The faithful five

It will go well

It is not mine

It is Detroit

A big city haze

I can’t see what I can’t see

I don’t like taking my time

With melting popsicles

That I didn’t stand in line to buy

Guess guess guess, guesses the fool

The truth is that I don’t know

And yes, flesh will stink if it burns

Hope says there’s no chance of sorrow

They will be tested tomorrow

Why are we talking of summer

We said it would not come

Then you mentioned it again

Are you a mime, a mime in a city square?

Are the coins the coin-throwers throw

The coins you find in the mouths of fish

Or is it just an enjoyable show

That takes up dead air?

I suppose I pledge allegiance

To the “you are here” and now

And don’t appreciate wasted time

Of tick-tocking repetition and stares

If the yodeler sang so loud and long

Then why do you pack your bags

And call for prayers that will be done?

It’s fine. It’s fine. You’re quite a pair.

But why are we talking about summer

I want to ride the ride

You sweetly did tonight.

And I thought it was cute

How you gathered your thoughts

There’s a twirl and a leap in your eye

That you can’t be so tired you hide

And I recognize the longing

For that little rescue ship

Building a house for two

On that island sounds crazy right

I see a crew working

Abusing 9-to-5

I would watch that show forever

And collect seashells

Like that bird with clipped wings

The flight came from outside of us

I want to ride the ride

Something crackles

When I sit up in this bed

Like that old settlin’ house

That I should not have settled in

Creepy wind noises

Announce my week resistance,

All-knowing One

So You say, “Suffer”, and I shall

‘Til the lock drops

So You say, “Suffer”, and I shall

Eyes set, fixed

There are 24 dings without the seatbelt

Each with an announcement

I wasn’t meant to know.

Isn’t that just always

The way it is with me,

All-knowing One?

So You say, “Suffer”, and I shall

‘Til eternal ahs

So You say, “Suffer”, and I shall

Eyes set, fixed

How I wish I knew how much of it was real

To what extent, to what degree

You learned arpeggio

I learned how to take a wall down

You were OK with the friend

OK with a colleague

But you’ve never met a boss you liked

And there’s no way

That could be my fault

Nobody in your life has all of you

Even those who are supposed to

But I learned that too late

Like a widow who calls her husband

Just to say, “Don’t go”

That was a great thing you did

Stopping by that cotton field

To hold and touch

Clever rolling lab

That impressed me

And I remember

Knowing she was held

Good

That was a great thing you did

Befriending when it was forbidden

Of course you knew that

Still impressed me

It still took some balls

To get those cell numbers

Good

That was a great thing you did

Calling on a lonely night

I had to ask you

That’s at least something

Was that the last time?

Can’t believe I expected “close”

You’ve never given more

Good

Have a nice life

You are puffed up

You are the simplest

Ignorant one

Truly truly dumb

And a hothead

An abuser

A neglected

Small

You compensate…always.

Navy boy