I ain’t paying rent

On your busted-up home

The grass our front

Is sitting waste high

The cat our back

Has seconds to die

The neighbors hate you

Can’t blame ’em at all

You set fire

To their trash cans

And threw oil

On their lawn

You’re a hateful

Mess of bitter

With a battle-ax nose

For sniffin’ the sinister

And spreading the cold

I don’t know why I loved you

Truly don’t have a clue

Must have been in a war

With my lonely

Or at peace

With my doom

Heaven’s not ready for you
So sleep and then sing your tune
Heaven. Heaven is in another morning
Wake and do the best that you can do
Heaven’s not ready for you

Heaven’s not ready for you
You struggle on for now as we all must do
Heaven. Heaven is in the shallow
But You’ve got deep water to get through
Heaven’s not ready for you

Heaven’s not ready for you
You can’t walk before your cue
Heaven. Heaven is in the credits
And your name will be listed then too
Heaven’s not ready for you

It’s like you walk with a peg leg

‘Cause we all hear you coming

We all feel you well

It’s like you are a skilled strangler

‘Cause you leave us breathless

Living or not as you will

It’s like you hold all the strings

‘Cause we move when you say

We do what you empower

It’s like you like leading

‘Cause none of us knows best

And you know it

We crawled out
The east window
To play I spy
My brother drove by
And announced
What he thought
But not before
The thick of it
And the long
And short of it
But not before
Such enjoyment
Of sleep
That was something
And nothing at all
All at the same time

Dropped

All the way down

How long

Time to think

Time to pray

Because of the heat

Because of fear

Out of defiance

Or want

Captured on film

Heard by anyone

Known at all

 

I think

I would have

Jumped also

And knowing me

Would feel

Immediate doubt

And I trust

There would have been

Enough time

For my doubt

To settle

Into resolve

Jimmy told me to stop singing
That way
He sat beside me in the church choir
Not because he wanted to
But because he promised his momma
That he’d give church a try
He sang bass
Predictably
I sang tenor
Sometimes alto
I was 11
Jimmy was 18 maybe 19
Jimmy needed to be named Jimmy
Needed his truck
Needed his girlfriend
Needed to be handsome
Needed to be a good ole boy
Needed a great Friday night
Needed a great Sunday morning forgiveness
Every Jimmy in our town
Promised momma
They’d be in church come Sunday
As in every South Carolina town

Once I told Jimmy
That I admired him
I lied
I didn’t
But since I knew he didn’t care for me
I thought I’d let him know
That I didn’t think he was so bad
In my own way
He laughed and said
Oh you don’t want to be like me
He was right
I didn’t
He said
If anything, I want to be like you
He also lied
Southern gentlemen are so charming
I turned and walked away
Knowing that
I didn’t care that he didn’t like my voice
He didn’t care if I admired him or not
He and I were not destined to be friends
He and I sang in different sections of the choir
After all

Repeat Repeat Repeat
All agree it is needed
All agree it is wanted

Repeat Repeat Repeat
So who will lead it
Hello? Anyone? Crickets.

Repeat Repeat Repeat
To the rescue – To the rescue
Nope – Not today

Repeat Repeat Repeat
If indeed needed and wanted
Let the leaders rally

I’ll need a minute
To breathe in cool air

And this from time to time
To access beauty and meaning

So I’m not quiet
I’m reflecting

So, I’m not escaping
I’m surviving

I’ll need a minute
To breath in cool air

And this from time to time
To access grace and drive

So I’m not dying
I’m pausing

So I’m not finished
I’m regrouping

When the flags go up
I think of antennae and whiskers
Just makes me wonder
Do insects and animals hate them
Of course they are useful
They help protect and survive
But do you think there’s ever a moment
When they just want to turn it all off
Like today
I heard about a meeting that was taking place
It’s a meeting that probably should include me
But it doesn’t
And, mind you, I don’t want to go to the meeting
But, my spidey-sences tell me
That decisions in this area
Can’t be made without me
And will ultimately
Have to be run by me anyway
So do I say something
If I do, it will look like I’m insecure
Or worse…gasp…micromanaging
But if I don’t
I’ll be knowingly wasting everyone’s time
Plus, the one who is calling the meeting
Often races ahead though with a good heart
And is disappointed when we have to pump the breaks
So, I don’t know

It makes me think of antennae and whiskers
Every single time
Is there a way to just be left unsignaled
I’d love to be completely unaware
It’s exhausting

How long
Does the smell
Of smoke linger
After you’ve been
Through the fire
How long
Does the sting
Persist
In the eyes
How long
The tickle
In your throat
No doubt
That moment
Was swift
For you
Likely
You barely
Remember it
But for me
I still feel
The burn