When you see green

You can sit still

For such a long time

And you freeze

Just to see

Who drives by

When you see green

You are patient

Without end

And 30 minutes more

Simply means

30 minutes more

When you see green

God can settle in

As a friend

Saying nothing

As a knower

Just gazing

When you see green

You feel hollow

And you know

It’s not good

But waiting

Fills time

When you see green

It’s all a man can see

Ok. Ok.

So we’ll put it to bed

I’ll put it to bed

Though I’ll never hear

Anything that resembles

Recognition

Even though

The entire crowd

Knows that you know

We all know

That you really are

That self-aware

But your play

Your move

Is to make me

Your villain

And while

It does help

To know that

No one agrees

With your easy tale

I’m losing

Days and nights

Hoping

With daggers

In my eyes

That you will

Shape your lips

To form the words

That say

I didn’t take

No

You forsook

And what

A fool I am

To think

You could ever

Sit in that chair

Humility is not

Your color

Of choice

You saved my life today

And I’m not thankful yet

Though a bit

It will come in time

Freedom is a learned walk

I’ll get there

But I see it

The significance

And while I mourn

For lack of a better word

I am really looking forward

To knowing my new self

For ten years

And twenty years

And longer

Is too long

To be false

You sent

You saved me

I will hold this knife

In this covenant

I will do it

I will

I will be devoted

And show you

I will sell you

Til they love you

And you will never know

If I’m really for you

Or so I’ll tell myself

But you will know

And you do know

That I am a pariah

To myself

So how could I ever understand

What I’ll be the last to understand

That all the while

I was just and simply

The biggest biggest fraud

Selling watches from my overcoat

In a crowd of grownup businessmen

Who know the trinkets are fakes

Yet smile as they steadily walk by

And promote me

And promote me

Yet don’t know me

Cause he’ll sure try, they’ll say

And he, they’ll say, will be fine enough

He’s conscientious

He’s tenacious

He’s fastidious

He’s studious

He’s industrious

So

He’ll do

As a fraud among frauds

He’ll do

And so

It’s all a blur

Really

Though some of it

Some fleeting moments

Were real and true

Though which ones

I’m not sure

My memory

Doesn’t favor

The hoaxer

Who doesn’t know

He doesn’t know

Oh saddle a daydream

Break ‘em like you used to

Paint the whole scene

On a dirt road ride

After a stop at the 5 and dime

Candy in hand

Eyes fixed

Mind building worlds

With secret villains

Hidden perils

Such confusion

The whole tribe

In need of a hero

On a ten-speed bike

And it felt good

To be perfect

For the task

Everyone living

There in that cling

Eagerly agreed

Something had to be done

And it all came down to me

Coincidentally

Jit-jotted yellow and red

Big crayon mess

Two color rainbow

Sidewalk outside my mom’s

Lays there in the afternoon

Summer sun’s a scorcher

But talk talk talk

In the morning and evening

To everyone and no one.

That jit, too old

Nobody want ‘im.

But so young

Everybody thinks somebody

Should look after ‘im.

He’s a street kid

Doing pretty fine

All things considered

Can’t get a job

Couldn’t keep it if he did

Can’t read can’t write

And can’t remember

The real name of “dad”

The real name of “mom”

But he thinks

They was nice

He’s pretty sure

They dead

I supply the crayons

Mom supplies the food

Pretty much all we can do

He is, I guess, a kind of brother

Jit and me

Of note

Only power

The house fire

Needs lit

And none

But one

Has heat

Or spark

There’s a shouting

Obvious noise

Announcing

The drowning

Of us

How we need

A fresh bold wind

To rouse

Our suspicions

And then certainties

Of your pinnacle

I need you to provide

As I walk wobbly

And this small thing

Alone now I see

I trust toward you

And worry more

About that girl

And that offense

Cause no sluth wins

When you don’t

Disperse the lies

Of that peddler

So only power

Don’t run round n round

Don’t endure us

Don’t endure us

But roar now

Roar on

I’m open to a holiness

What of dreams

If miles above

And depths underneath

There can’t be

The best cold

That soldiers on

Dismissing the dull

And layering

The lovers

With lace

Sneaking around

Smacking

Snapping

Prissing

You make you uncomfortable

So step away

Way way away

Your calling can’t be worn

Like a mourning dress

Eyes say

I hate you

Mouth says

Nothings wrong

Shoulders say

Look I’m brave

But oh the words

Of your behavior

They paint you as

A spoiled brat

With a team

Of back-up singing

Spoiled brats

Stop it now

Or all your adorers

Will quickly get sick

And lose their taste for you

And not out of hatefulness

But painful sadness

What a pathetic character

You have chosen to be

You forget

You have options

You are not stuck

Awe is a choice

Dream a little

I’m hungry deep down in

In a primal ravenous way

It’s my truest color for sure

Me as best defined me

Not only but first

Not alone but preeminent

A Lord if ever there was

The only thing left

That if missing

Would consequentially

Leave an unquenchable thirst

I was made for this

I was made to enjoy

I was made to walk

In wide open spaces

With borders known

From the most near light