Been trying to solve you

Interrogatively slicing and dicing

Been trying to get to the root

So peck peck peck peck peck peck

Looking for the larvae

Looking for the seed

Tearing you apart

Incessantly

 

Dropped anchor in your story

Dropped anchor and will stay

Leaving all the pock marks

Of investigative bullying

Looking for the larvae

Looking for the seed

Tearing you apart

Incessantly

 

Yes I see it’s brutal

Leaves you dripping with pain

Yes it could leave you splayed

Yes it could leave you dead

Looking for the larvae

Looking for the seed

Tearing you apart

Incessantly

 

But I can’t leave you unsolved

My mind won’t leave you unknown

And even after the last great a-ha

I won’t be satisfied at all

Looking for the larvae

Looking for the seed

Tearing you apart

Incessantly

 

So I see you’re flabbergasted
Well, alright alright
How do you know you’re rope
Isn’t simply shorter than most

I can get upset too
Flail and kick all about
Like my bed is a scene
To be made and made

It seems you’re committed
To this anger
It seems you’re determined
To squeeze to the last drop

I can get upset too
Flail and kick all about
Like my bed is a scene
To be made and made

So my “calm down” won’t do
And my “now let’s talk” won’t do
And my “chill out” won’t either
So get in there, I guess

I can get upset too
Flail and kick all about
Like my bed is a scene
To be made and made

Now the whole family looks down

Like common buzzards on the hunt

Though not fixated on prey

But mortification

They haven’t eaten well in 4 years

And their stomachs churn day and night

And the conversation can’t be

And the conversation won’t be

Is it enough to say
That I saw a man today
Who was proud and fit
Good looking and well dressed
Asking for supplies
So that he could clean up
A mess left by another
He wanted
And was willing
And asking
To help

Is it enough to say
That his attendant
For in this place
There are attendants
Kindly refused his request
And said she would be happy
To clean up the mess
He wanted
And was willing
And asking
To help

Is it enough to say
That the attendants
Do not want cleaning chemicals
In the hands of the residents
No matter how proud and fit
Or good looking and well dressed
They might be
He wanted
And was willing
And asking
To help

Is it enough to say
That there is often a clash
Between wanting to give
The dignity of participation
And wanting to provide
Care and protection
And knowing oversight
He wanted
And was willing
And asking
To help

What color is unsettled
Cause it frames my faith
Cause it is my bed
I can’t put a value
On a still sea
On a swamp
So little do I understand
About my senses
About telling the time
I’m hollowed and cavernous
With a wind blowing through
With a name I might like

I daydream dark daydreams
Ever since I was left
At the station
I starve and I torture
Cause that’s in me now
I guess
They couldn’t have known
What a thing it did to me

I daydream dark with restlessness
Ever since big shirts
Hid my ribs
I kidnap and I expose
Cause that’s in me now
I guess
They couldn’t have known
What a thing it did to me

I daydream dark then stop
Before I say their name
Or see their face
I click my tongue and wince
Cause that’s in me now
I guess
They couldn’t have known
What a thing it did to me

It’s steep
And I’m kept
Far and far
Lay the masses
Gruesome falls
Each one
And I wish
Different choices
Were made
And I wish
None had to perish
But still I’m held
Still I trumpet
About the grace
About the hand
About the eye

That’s not my stuff
But I’ll get it
Glass everywhere
Shining like diamonds
Store looted
I’ll take mine
Though it’s not mine
I’ll take what I want
It’s my way
Of sticking it
To the man
I’m angry
I’ve had enough
Big business does nothing
Doesn’t see me
Prizes things as trophies
Doesn’t see me or mine
Leave me to it
Don’t try to stop me police
Don’t try to stop me self
Don’t try to stop me mom
It’s a moment to say something
I never get to say
So don’t stop me
Don’t stop us
It’s about me
It’s about us
Being mad
Right now
Right here
Here and now
Tomorrow we’re back
To the same old mess
But tonight
I pick a fight
We pick a fight

Bekah sent a text
Hello
Hello Beks how are you
She replied in emojis
Bekah has downs syndrome
I replied back with emojis
You silly
No you silly
Mom birthday today
Oh that’s fun
Yes, Mom birthday
Tell her happy birthday
K then balloon emojis
Birthday cake emojis returned
More balloon emojis
Give her a hug for me
You silly
No you silly
Ha ha
Bye Bekah
Bye

You’re no grizzly
Though you pride yourself to be
You’re just a mad boy
Just a mad mad boy
Momma made you mad
Daddy made you mad
The white ones and the black ones
Made you mad mad mad
So you growl
So you growl and growl
And build wall on wall
With your lego emotions
And you know what you know
Damn sure of yourself
Very sure until
Your little trip with God
And the tearful fountain
And the patient line-by-line
That cabin did you good
You’re no grizzly